Alice’s Little Adventure

I was at the San Francisco Airport and was taking off for New York, an exciting week long vacation, consisting of operas, ballets, theaters and masses of smashing parties. I had just been at the airline counter, gotten my ticket, dropped off my luggage and felt totally set for my exciting journey. I had enough time for a cup of coffee and some buttery crumpets. Then it was off to the departing gate till boarding on the jumbo jet. It was to be my first fancy flight, first class, champagne and, caviar! And most thrilling of all…. was that I’d be sitting next to Carrie Cameron the most prominent and famed opera singer, her handsome hubby Tripp Trapper, the dashing tap dancer of the Truancy Club, their sweet daughter Karamee who was on her way to become a famous country singer and their charming son, Little Bagli.

         First I had to run to the ladies room and was able to get into the nice spacious stall set for handicaps. After that, I washed and dried my hands and was about to open the stall door to let myself out when I realized that I could not open the silly bathroom door. I thought, ‘Oh no, this is terrible…. I think the door must be stuck.’ I was beginning to feel a slight rush of frustration, sweatiness and annoyance creeping up towards me. I called for help, hoping that one of the many ladies would hear me and come to my aid. But no, it was too early in the morning and no one seemed to be bustling into the ladies room. I kept calling anyway and desperately continued to try and open the crazy door, but all to no avail. I started to scream fiercly, in the great hope that someone, from the lobby, might hear my distressing and dismaying screams and my piteous moans. But no…. everything was eerily quiet; a strange unnerving silence seemed to reign over the whole airport. I thought this odd because before it had been so noisy and rambunctious with people stomping off somewhere or gabbling on their cell phones or typing madly on their portable laptops while sipping their coffees and waiting for their departure time.  I remembered seeing masses of children running wildly back and forth, to and fro, up and down the waiting room in sheer boredom and driving their poor parents insane. I suddenly realized that this was not a natural silence and I was no longer hearing these wild children storming about.  I finally came to my senses and realized that it was really silly to go on in my turbulent way, ranting and raving like a madwoman. I thought, ‘ OK… now be reasonable about this. This hysterical craziness is not going to help and besides nobody is listening. Think Alice, what are you going to do about this?’ Incidentally, Alice is me and I am very good at giving myself excellent and reasonable advice. So…I sat on the toilet seat and realized that I still had an apple in my carry bag. I reached to get eat it, eating always helps me to think but, whoops…………..

         The toilet seat turned into a very hyper flaming red flying carpet that seemed to mumble some words, I guess, to me. Since everything was going crazy for me anyway, I firmly gripped onto the carpet, hugged my little bag for safety and, off I went over muddy green hills, snow-capped mountains, entire fields with burnt yellow crops, small grey castles (they were small because I was so high up) laden with faded flags which were weakly waving in the wind. Oh no, the silly carpet started saying, ‘Ouch, ouch,’ every time I took a big grip of it as I felt that I was about to fall. Believe me, it was so totally bizarre and spooky to hear a carpet saying, ‘Ouch, ouch,’ or ‘Move, move’ or ‘Sit, sit.’ Finally it let me hold on to its tassels. But oh, what an odd carpet it was with its creepy, sharp little voice. 

         Suddenly, I felt the flaming red carpet descending to the ground. We, the carpet and I, landed on a lusterless pink field.  Although it had been a most truly nutty flight, I turned around to thank the carpet but it had vanished into thin air.

          Instead there was a small wagon, decorated with nice but simple flowers, and a darling brown donkey. I wanted to pet the donkey but was afraid it might not like that and decide to nip me. Then I remembered that in my carry bag, I had a small plastic bag with some sugar cubes, which I always carried with me because of the strong medicine I had to take every now and then. After taking my bitter medicine, I’d pop in some sugar cubes to take the disgusting taste away. The sugar always did the trick. Ok….  back to the donkey, so I gave it a sugar cube and it seemed very pleased and began to nuzzle me. Then it waved its head toward the wagon and I guessed that it wanted me to hop into the wagon, and because I knew this wasn’t the earthly world but the magical and mystical one, I hopped in.

         The little brown donkey scampered off into a dark green forest and then it galloped, at high and speedy pace down a rocky hill. Whoops…  I wasn’t ready for this and clutched onto my best friend, the carry bag, and seized anything I could hold on to. It was like being on a roller coaster!  As if the donkey had read my mind, he slowed down a bit and continued to go into another darker green forest at a frisky and galloping gait, like a prancing pony. It, the darling donkey, began traipsing up on a windy road going uphill. Then we got out of the forest and the very winding uphill road and I beheld a beautiful and not so big castle. The darling donkey stopped right by the front door. I jumped off the wagon and gave the donkey another sugar cube, which it ate immediately. In a corner I saw some golden hay and orange carrots, which I thought, must be for the little donkey.  I took off his wagon gears and led him to the carrots and hay. Then I saw a pretty brook brimming with fresh clear water and a bucket nearby. I filled the bucket with water and carried this to the darling donkey that trotted, ever so gently, towards to me. I also gave him the rest of my sugar cubes, which he adored. I thought to myself, ‘I don’t think I’ll be taking anymore of that vile tasting medicine and there are no grown ups here to tell me what to do.’ I went over to the little brook to get the sugar stickiness off my hands and as I turned to look at my new friend and thank him for the ride…. he was gone!

         As the little brown donkey had stopped in front of the brown door of the castle, I thought I should open the door. So… clutching my bag I went in. There were no people to be seen, no king, no queen and, no joker. All was eerily silent and I could see the dust flying around in the ghostly dim air. I walked and found myself in a long ill lit and gloomy corridor with dirty white doors left and right. Because I was tremendously curious, I opened the dirty white doors but they were all locked! Mm… I thought. At the end of the long and straight corridor I saw a red door. I opened the red door and……

         I nearly fell into an azure blue lake! But luckily, not far from where I stood I caught sight of a little rowboat, a faded red rowboat. The rowboat was attached to a piece of long strong rope. I took hold of the rope and pulled the little rowboat closer to me. I somehow managed to get into the little boat with my carry bag without tumbling all over, as I usually do. You ought to know, dear friend, I am extremely clumsy. The moment I sat on the little boat, the boat floated of its own accord down the blue watery path. It was a beautiful winding river that went on and on in a most leisurely and sleepy fashion. On either side of the river grew tall dull green grass splashed with very pale pink and yellow flowers. The sky was a heavenly blue with a few pearly white clouds, the weather was warm and hazy, some elegant ducks swam alongside the little boat and quacked, ‘O hello, hello,’ and suddenly I felt so tired and sleepy. I just wanted to close my eyes for a second but just then the boat sailed right into a dark, dingy and, clammy cave. Nothing but darkness, doom and gloom reigned in that dismal place. It was suddenly freezing.  One could feel despair looming in the air. The warmth and calmness of the gentle blue river, the magic of the dull grass with its lovely but dull dotted flowers and lovely ducks swimming by was smashed out of my mind when the boat entered the cave. It became very colder and I was so glad to have my warm jacket on and, of course, my faithful little bag at my side, like a little dog. How surprisingly shocked was I when I saw what came next!

         As my eyes had grown accustomed to the dimness of the cave, I saw something so immensely hideous and horrible that I had to let out a frightful scream, like one of those silly ladies in the movies……………………………….. Standing on a rocky hump next to a murky wet and slimy wall stood the smelliest, most ugliest sight I have ever laid my eyes upon. Because the smell was so enormously stinky and hideous and yet I was so curious… I had to take a good look and see where the horrid and vile smell was coming from. What I saw gave me a terrible and ghastly shock. I thought only in fairy tales was this possible.  A monster, a huge beastly looking giant. He had big, bulging eyes… very watery from crying and screaming. His humongous and monstrous nose dripped madly from all his snorting and sniffling. His brown and nasty looking ears, which were in bad need of a good clean up, were poppy red with black bumps and who knows what else was in there. His messy hair was wildly sticking out in all directions because he was madly pulling his locks and blaring, ‘Where is my bag! Where is my bag?  My precious little bag! If I don’t find my little bag then I’ll scream even more and turn everybody, who comes into my cave, into stones or fishes and lock them all up in my treasure box!!’ I clutched onto my own little bag and thought, ‘Well, that big, slobbery, yucky giant is never going to get my nice little bag!’

         Then out of nowhere came a very pleasant and matter-of-fact voice saying, ‘Oh Alice, we are so glad you could finally make it. We need your help badly.’ But first I had to find the bearer of the voice. So…  I wildly began looking around and was given another horrible shock. Not far from the little boat, where I was in, a very odd and unpleasant looking fish-man swam in the water saying, ‘Yoo-hoo, here I am, see me? Excuse my ugliness but we have all been turned into stones or ugly fishes by this naughty giant. I, unfortunately, have been turned into a most unattractive fish-man. Anyway, to make a long story short, we need your help.’ ‘Why me?’ I asked trembling. The fish-man looked at me and lovingly said,’ Because my dear, you are human and we are not. We are from Fairland and are very fair and gentle in deed and kindness but in the hands of this ridiculous giant we shall perish and become nonexistent and thus Fairland shall be no more. Sad to say, in the giants grasps, we will be constantly changed into different shapes and sizes, always ugly, into whatever the giant wishes or desires and always according to his moods. But you are from the Human World and cannot be changed into something the giant desires. So,’ and here the fish-man handed me a foul-smelling, grubby and, grotty wet bag which was the size of a large potato bag and said, ‘ Please, please, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease, dear precious adoring Alice, throw this smutty bag to the giant. If he sees you then he will know that you are from the Human World and will not touch you or harm you in anyway.’ Well, there was nothing I could do but throw the smutty bag to the bawling giant and I sincerely wanted to get away from this stinking nightmare. So… with all my might and main I threw the revolting thing to the giant who looked at me and said with shocking surprise, ‘Uhhhhh Human, Human…..,’ then he saw his bag and smiled and stopped his horrible screeching  saying ‘Dank you, dank you, Human.’ I looked at him and was utterly glad that he’d finally stopped that crazy maddening bawling of his. The moment I threw the bag, the darkness lifted but oh no, he looked down and saw my nice carry bag and began blaring and screeching, ‘Your bag, your bag, gimmy-gimmy-gimmy!’ I said, ‘No!’ He stamped his foot, shattering the cave like crazy, screaming, ‘Mommy, Mommy, stupid Human won’t gimmy bag!’ Out of nowhere came a most terrifying, alarming and, truly gut wrenching sight saying, ‘Oh, there you are, my pet!’ Then looking down at me she, the horrible mother giant, snatched my bag and gave it lovingly to her baby giant.

         As I closed my eyes to wipe the terror I quickly opened my eyues and….

         I was back on the little boat, that was now cherry red, and flowing down the very beautiful blue and clear river  which, was now filled with diamonds and sapphire stones that glinted in the sun. The grass which had been once been so dull was now emerald green, and on either side of me were the yellow flowers, which seemed brighter and more splendid in my eyes. A noble and grand cream-colored dog with long red fur, that rippled in the sun, ran alongside the grassy area by the river barking happily. Next to him was a little girl with shoulder length blond hair and a blue dress and carrying a lovely little pink and white bag. She was running next to the dog but both stopped and waved at me. I waved back at them and wondered where they had come from come from, as I hadn’t seen them before.

         Suddenly, the little boat came to halt in front of the open door that led into the silent castle with its long dim corridors and with those odd dirty white closed doors. I thought, I should get out of the boat, walk through the mysterious corridor again and, I was certain, to meet that faithful little donkey somewhere. I hauled myself out of the boat quite nicely. Walked down the long spooky corridors with its many mysterious locked doors. This time I wasn’t curious to see if the doors opened… the doors simply opened of their own accord and more radiant sunshine drifted into the long corridors. Exotic birds flew from outside the doors and people, handsome people in long elegant robes of all colors, came through the doors walking and smiling and talking all at once, as if they had all had woken up from a bad dream. No one saw me, everyone was somehow too glad to be where they were standing and they seemed only to be talking about this splendid event. Like people who have, at long last, found the air and light and sun after being for so long in the damp and cold and gloom.

         As I walked down the long corridors looking left and right at all the beautiful people, I was abruptly stopped. A most magnificent and alluring tall lady with three beautiful fluffy adorable cats and two darling little girls, one of the little girlsI had already seen running alongside the river and carrying the gorgeous little pink and white bag, stopped me and said, ‘Oh, Lady Alice, we all wish to thank you for saving us from the giant Selfabsorbed .’ Here she curtseyed, to my total embarrassment. Everyone, including the three charming cats and the enchanting little girls bowed and curtseyed. Then the alluring lady with her dazzling green eyes said, ‘I am the queen Tessdmaralda. These are my three charming cats; Pumpkin, Twinkles and Midnight and the lovely girls are Lali and Isala. This beautiful country is Fairland and the fish man who spoke to you was my loyal attendance. We are so grateful that you listen to him. Before you return to your world, we would like to give you something as a token of great thanks.’ Out from behind her… she showed me the beautiful little pink and white bag, which sparkled and looked even more precious close up. She placed her long hand inside the bag and brought out a dear little bottle saying, ‘If ever you wish to see us again or talk to us or walk in our forest…then you only have to open this little bottle and take a sip of Fairland Elixir and your every desire will be granted… and oh I almost forgot, the taste will not be bitter or nasty… you will never have to take it with a sugar cube again.’ The three charming cats came to me and, to my utter astonishment, gave me little golden bells. Out of the bells came the loveliest music. The alluring lady looked at me and said in her silver voice, ‘These are very special bells. You will find out more about them. But, now you must run along, my dear. The little donkey is waiting for you.’ With tears streaming down my face I said goodbye to all of them, turned around and instantly found myself in the courtyard where I had left the little donkey.

         I ran to the little donkey and lovingly put my arms around it and said, ‘Thank you for waiting for me.’ The donkey, looking very magnificent with garlands of pink flowers around its neck, was pulling a most splendid little wagon that was now lavishly decorated with more flowers on it and the on the wagon sat the two little girls, Lali and Isala with their noble dog, happily yelling for me to hop into the wagon. They sangbeautiful songs and while I listened in rapture the little donkey trotted pleasantly through the green forest with its ravishing flowers and bejeweled birds. This went on for sometime and then very unexpectedly the little donkey came to a halt.

         There I saw the flaming red carpet by the wide open field, that was now glowing in golden colors, and I knew that I had to go and sit on it and that it would whisk me away somewhere. My heart was dreading the wild flight. I quickly remembered that, with this silly carpet, I couldn’t hold on to anything without the carpet saying  ‘Ouch, ouch!’ As my thoughts roamed around of the unsettling flight, the children had gotten me off the wagon and were telling me to sit on the red carpet no matter what. I thought this odd, not only were the children sitting on the red carpet, but the donkey and the little wagon too. I looked at this and remarked, ‘Well, this is going to be a crowded ride.’  What do you think happened?

         The flaming red carpet turned into a bright red caboose and the donkey had turned into a young man driving the red caboose! We all sat on bright pink polka dot seats and held onto golden grab bars! We looked out of the big windows and, while joyfully laughing, we saw lovely castles with flowing and colorful flags, violet and white snow caped mountains shining like little crystal gems, green fields laden here and there with long silver trees and slivers of gleaming silver rivers and, shiny blue lakes adorned and showered by grand waterfalls. But……….

         As everything went swiftly, we came to sudden halt. The divine children and kind gentleman helped me off the red caboose and they looked at me and said, ‘ Alice, you must hurry. See that grey door? Open that door and you will find yourself back at the San Francisco Airport. But first, you’ll be in the big spacious bathroom stall but do not worry the bathroom door will open. You’ll find Carrie, Trip, Karamee and little Bagli all waiting for you. Go now, you will have a great time in New York with Sarah and Rebecca and Alexander! Oh, I forgot, these are for you. We all love you and thanks a million! We shall never forget our dear Alice!’ I looked at them, my heart was about to break into tears. The nice, kind man said, ‘ Hey, don ‘t cry. We will come back for you and you’ll be writing stories about us. Everybody will love reading the stories. But Alice, dearest one, you have to go now otherwise you will miss that flight to New York and make the others anxious.’

         I kissed them all and rushed to the grey door. Before I opened the grey door I turned around to look at my newfound friends, they were there watching and waving at me. I blew them another kiss and yelled out a last farewell. After opening the grey door I found myself in the bathroom stall. The door to the bathroom stall opened without any struggle. When I arrived at my gate of departure there were Carrie, Tripp, Karamee and little Bagli and all exclaiming, ‘Oh good, you’re finally here… the plane is leaving soon.’